Storia Nascosta

The family doesn't celebrate Mother's nor Father's day so it was awkward when pap tried to bring the family together for such occasion, the day was almost spoilt since bigbro gotta work today. We still ended up going to a nearby restaurant to have dim sum. It was Yunan Garden, I think? It sucked big time because I had no appetite and my face was not ready to get out under the Sun -- my cheek started showing prominent red marks/spots, thus spoiling my morning mood.

Thankfully, the mood turned better when we went to IMM and my thoughts today were fine too. Yeap, not like last night when I was still under dumbness control.

 
So, I've been wanting to shop Daiso for a while, a proper shopping and really, we bought junkies from there. Here's what I got...

A water-filled dumbbell. Filling it with water wasn't a good idea, it's not heavy at all. I was thinking of sand, marbles or mini pebbles. Yea, I've been wanting to get one of this stuff but I kept couldn't get hold of those soda bottle which I thought was a cool replacement for dumbbells. I had been trying to but dad kept on recycling them off.

I don't want to get a real one too. Heh. :p  It may be expensive! :O
 
 

A $2 toy to stare at --- it last about 3 minutes. For real? Heck.
 
 
Lastly, something I've no intention to get now but I got it anyway --- A new workspace chair from v.hive Home Interiors and it'll be delivered this Friday's afternoon if I remember correctly.

 
Let's hope the new chair brings new luck.

I didn't get many things for mom though, just a shampoo brush and condiment bottle. :P At least she was enjoying herself today at Daiso too.

"Blessing in disguise".

Although pap and Thurdy haven't meet each other yet but sometimes, the thing they thought, concern and mention about to me... clicks. They're like my 2 palms in my life. Thurdy said it's because pap's gonna be his pap too. Yea.. :)

Thurdy had been mentioning it the whole time this May just to cool me down... and I was looking at our conversation about it again. Times and times, he kept on telling me but my mind was close and wasn't taking in his suggestion. When I read it again, it really tells me how dumb I had been for a while...

Since the first day of May, although I haven't got any letter yet but he had been concerning already. I wonder why I'm not thinking that way then? With a stubborn and close mind, that's why.

That's after I got the letter. See... deep down, I'm feeling worse. My words were all wrong already. Confused on the inside, fine on the outside. I will never know much about myself.
 
 
But earlier on... Thurdy's last (probably) blessing in disguise reminder to me is in this story form which created a deep impact. I hope my mind will open up soon.
He was trying to get me to start thinking positively and I believe I will... I will. There are much more worser case than I am anyway, it's not like I'm dying.
 

Whereas for dad, he said blessing in disguise as well this morning when he was trying to comfort me while typing an email for me. I wasn't listening to him much since I was surprise at such a coincident but I guess he's just telling me the same thing too -- think positively no matter what. He's supporting, Thurdy's supporting, I'm lucky, right?
 
The only too bad will be not being able to start studying this year and it shouldn't matter to me much. There's always next year and the year after next and after next and loads.. I'm just too concern about certain things that makes me so determined to do it now.

Oh no... I'm feeling low, not sure if it will affect my sleep like what I used to have before last month. Damn insomnia challenge again, I'm afraid of that. :(

Today, I managed to overcome my low mood thanks to this song I've been replaying over and over again. :( But that's for today.

:((((((((((((( So so sad.... I'm not given the chance to study this year. I really don't want to waste this year doing something else other than studying. If only there are more local Universities... the feeling right now is definitely the same feeling I'm having when I'm trying to get into Polytechnic. It's the same! Argg.. why do I always have to play such a near "it's the end" type of game? :(

NUS must be processing my rejection letter. :(

How many pair of shoes do you have? Out of those pairs, how many do you wear more than a few times a year?
Submitted by fightinggale.

Just 2 heels and no flat. I've been wearing the wedge one for quite a while already, since the last semester of RP I believe, except for the new heel which is slightly higher by an inch is collecting dust at the moment. I got that during CNY and was thinking of keeping that so I can wear it when school starts but I guess... I can stop thinking about starting school this year anymore. :(

I'm planning to get a flat shoe though... but not anymore.

Flashes of lighting outside the window... will tonight rain hard? It'll be such a good weather for sleeping definitely so I'm trying to dry my hair quickly and grab the comfortable chance to get into bed. Aww.. hubby is missing this out. He's gonna be envious when I tell him that.

Nothing today too - no letters, can't get into JA site. I feel like I'm playing some survivor game with other people who are also waiting as well... am I on the waiting list? I don't even dare to think about it. I kept on thinking negatively but my parents are supportive and hoping too. They are anxious too. In fact, they really aren't sure what emotions to put up either, sorry or happy?

A couple more people over at the forum are getting rejection letters too... mine will be coming soon I guess.

Earlier on, Angie showed me QET and it kinda saddens me. If I got an offer to NUS, this will definitely pluck me out from the rest of the gang. I mean I don't mind being labeled as a "nerd" when I'm one already but extra lesson for English... :/ Gawd. I guess as long as I've got the chance to get in, it doesn't matter to me at all since I'm all power up to mug and work hard. Ho yah!

I'm serious! :O 

Just the thought of mugging again gets me excited. I wonder why I didn't have such feelings before in the past during secondary school? I guess when you're slowly maturing, you slowly realized what's right and wrong for you -- provided that you matured correctly.

Have a good night tonight --- oyasuminasai.

Oh dear -- I finally found the type of guy I'd go crazy for if I'm not attached and the above picture simply tells you all.  Of course, erm... not with the loads of makeup on the man's face but at least gives off that type of feeling Klaha is giving out in that picture will do. Well, right now if I do see such man on the road (which is not possible), I'd just glance at him a few time will do and wishes that more local guys can act more like a gentleman.

But right now, Thurdy's my all time favourite and I'm glad he likes this suit I showed him. :) Do you think such suit gotta be custom-made? Ahh.. wish I'm 22 soon.
 

Oh, and what can I say about today? I realized RP 08/09 batch has someone who has exactly the same name as me and I've got no letter today but I noticed that this afternoon, after the heavy rain, the street outside of my house felt lifeless. No jerks disturbed me too. :] I'm bored, I've got no games with low specs to kill time on, I can't donate my blood and can't get a part-time job too, it's like all fated. So, my idea of post-graduation is totally different from what I used to have when I was rushing my projects --- it totally sucks big time.

Well? I'm speechless about the findings too. The only thing that made me "high" was the add-ons I downloaded for Firefox, staring at Klaha's gentleman-style and 3 new interesting anime songs that I'll be sharing soon.
 
 
 
To end it all, I had too much satay for dinner it's making me sick. I'm not having a good diet too... oyasumi.

What is one thing you MUST do before you go to bed at night?

Follow Me Freckle Cream is a must at night for me! I've been on it for 4 years, it's very addictive but it's good for whitening. :p

What do you think of this suit?

I was thinking about having a wedding with the color theme of white and that color in the middle of Klaha's suit. Mom will definitely kills me but Thurdy will look really handsome in it. How about a full Visual Kei wedding? Haha... Ridiculous but interesting. I wonder if anyone did a Visual Kei wedding before? Or Gothic wedding? I wouldn't mind checking it out since I'm interested in a dark wedding. I've already decided to get a black gown, why not go further more with my crazy ideas? Lol.

Well... I can go further with my ideas but I forgot to do one major thing ---- does my Thurdy wants it? Will anyone wants a dark wedding theme? They'll probably think I'm crazy.

I was checking out more on Malice Mizer today and kept on listening to "Au Revoir" with Gackt as vocalist. Seriously, weird MV but great song! \(;~;)/! I kept singing along with it after replaying a few times.

I'm still curious how Mana looks like without makeup and couldn't seem to google up a single picture of it except for the picture I added in my previous post. That seemed to be the only picture I can find with him looking more like a dude than a Madam!

Even Mana looks much more feminine than me! :( I gotta buck up somehow.

By the way, over at the forum... there are people getting rejected already and... the atmosphere there isn't quite right anymore. My mind is confuse right now... I have a sense of getting a "Rejection" letter like everyone else in there but at the same time I'm like begging God to get me an acceptance letter. As long as there's no news, it's actually a fearsome news. Although I'd point out that there's no point hanging out at the forum anymore but I'd still like to go there to gather and whine with mateys that were waiting with me.

Today... I talked to the spoiler of my night. A jerk.

Enjoy the song and good night.

Hmmm... after watching this, I wonder if hubby is interested to pick up mandarin? ;) Maybe?

Hubby sent so much photos to me yesterday and it was OH--SO-CUTE! Ah, he's a big man now. I still got photos of him he sent me 3 years ago when we first met, a little boy. :p But right now, he's really like a man and I'm still looking like the same old kiddo I used to be before in those pictures I sent him. Mmm.. it's fine with me, he's fine with it too.

Today, I was checking out on Kanon Wakeshima, a new musician that just made her debut recently with the song "Still Doll". Yea, the ending of Vampire Knight. Really nice, really good and I love it a lot. I was just trying to piece together the idea of Gothic and cellist together... and Mana did a nice job. She's great and her voice too. Since Mana produced her, I got curious about Mana too and so I went to check out on him and the band he had, get to know more about visual kei, Goth and lots more, from Gackt to Klara to Hyde. Also, curious and wants to see the more manly side of him with him talking as well. Seems like Mana seldom talks and that interests me. Err... nope, I'm not a fan yet.

I realized I'm interested about it. :p Thought it will be cool to walk along the Goth style but not too heavy. I told about it and asked him what he thinks about Gothic and cellist getting together, cool or not? He replied boring. :/ Yea, Thurdy was right about them being emo-emo but that brings out a coolness behind that I admire... the same way I adore the idea of vampire.

Ahh.. interesting night I have, I've got a new genre of music taste added into my favorite list tonight.

Oh, I haven't got letter today too. It's getting depressing and the forum I keep on visiting to check out on the people there to see if they receive any letters are getting in a tight mood and not so active anymore.

Haiz... nothing to help to kill my waiting thoughts now. In fact, there's no point to keep on moving until there's something for me to get started with. Not a job... but rather I hope it's the excitement and anxiousness of mugging soon and working hard soon.

Okay, probably Vox doesn't work well in Opera yet or not compatible. Or it does... maybe I need to do some settings? But it's really hard to use Vox on Opera for me I'm sure.

1. It lags whenever I'm in the "Create" page of Vox when it doesn't on IE and Firefox. Some scripts running behind perhaps?

2. Pag still loading or I'm typing just too fast --- I typed a whole load of words and I took a minute to wait for everything to appear inside the content box! :p Wait.. everything was loaded finely too except something is really running behind but I don't know what it is.

3. The content box has no word wrap on Opera? What are the settings to change that then?

4. It's even harder to upload pictures in Opera. -_-

5. The entry got cut off too after posting through.

See?

So... anyone is working fine with Vox on Opera? Are there settings I need to set? Opera is nice to use but it saddens me when Vox doesn't wanna work together with it. It lags a lot, really.