Storia Nascosta

Sunday, 31 August, 2008

nobody@vox.com(L Miche) — Sun, 31 Aug 2008 07:19:47 +0800

06:46AM. Gone. Weekend's gone. Tutorials and lab2 not done.

So, I admit I'm missing RP. The gathering was great. I love it. I love the food more. Darn, RP's buffet is always the best! NTU should probably learn a bit and go for that buffet provider as well.

There weren't much people, probably 'bout 40+ of alumnis from classes '06, '07 and '08 (with the most) there but yea, it was still great. 'Cuz less people, more food. More servings! (:

A quick statistic of the number of SIT people that got into University for class of 2012... hmm.. <55, I suppose? With 45+ in SMU, 3 in NTU (including me) and 2 in NUS. Mervin seemed pretty much happy about the amount that went into SMU, and I felt a bit leftout somehow that we weren't being mentioned. :p Still cool though.

Upon entering the campus, I couldn't help mesmerizing the environment I used to walk in, the place where I slowly aspired what I want to be, what I want to do and all that stuffs. The staffs and facilitators were so happy to meet us, it was weird but sweet. Saw Kenneth and I don't know why CY is avoiding him. He asked about me, told him where I am and he said he knew it. I was surpised and asked how he knew it? And he replied, "I digged student's background." Oh yeah, crab.

I wanted to have a chat with ducky, CY and I actually. Angela was popular, definitely. Irene and Jan had their facilitator recognizing them as well and all of them looked happy. (: Mm.. ducky ducky, great man. But he was hard to look for, like a busy man in the party attending to his guests. Finally when we had the chance to, I couldn't chat with him anyway. At least, he knows that I was accepted in NTU after he kindly offered to help me with getting a job. He's not going to be in RP next semester and that.. sounds sad to me.

The whole time CY kept on telling me she noticed Friso was turning round looking at me... until I couldn't take it and told her because I hadn't greet him yet, which I intended to do so until he walked to me instead. The first word that came out from him was, "How's my web IG?" -_______- Barrggg..

I really wish I had apologize about that but I think I screwed up Friso's Web IG and it was hard to revive it too. Friso's another great guy. Yesterday was the first time I ever chat that heartily with him after knowing him for 3 years. Chatted 'bout stuffs like future plans, works, life, digital life :p and well, of course, a great help. Should have took a picture with him.

Should have took a picture with all the facilitator that I know, that were there. Nevermind. (: Till the next gathering or something, I hope. (:

And here are some of the silly stuffs we girls took... with my bad quality mobile cam.

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 01

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 02

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 03

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 04

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 06

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 07

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 08

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 09

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 10

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 12

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 14

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 15

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 17

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 18

Then a movie of Wall-E @ Causeway Point with CY and Irene after the gathering.

Aug30th08 - RP's SIT Alumni Gathering 11

And the great stuff gotten from RP, a wristband. I'm the only one with white. ):

Aug31st2008 - RP's Wristband (White)

Till the next gathering, toodles! (: I think I'm going to send in a testimonial.

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Sunday, August 10, 2008

nobody@vox.com(L Miche) — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 21:42:11 +0800

I'm pretty much a weakling actually, not being able to face reality bravely but at least, able to look at it with a mask over my face. That's when I feel much more comfortable to do anything just with that mask but... once I step over this so called "last bridge" for me, I don't know what to do. I don't know what to choose. I don't know where to walk, which path to step forward on and what right choices to make.

I'm not afraid of making wrong choices, I'm more afraid of making choices that I'll regret or choices that makes me waste my time on or choices that won't let me enjoy a single bit. Who doesn't, really? Even the mask I have don't help.

I've been giving quite a lot of thoughts about it today and probably last night, I couldn't sleep well was well because of this. It's not just the getting used of school life that bugs me but the everything and anything reality holds pierce silently somehow.

Then I know how much a coward I am actually..., which I'm not afraid to admit.

It's because I have hubby that I don't wish to make the wrong move again.

I have to... I need more time. I want to know what I really want. Definitely have to.

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Hubby's 20th Birthday.

nobody@vox.com(L Miche) — Sun, 27 Jul 2008 00:42:01 +0800

I made a silly package for him today and I was happy that he loved it. It may not be a physical thing but well, the thoughts that counts, right? It was what I can do within my limit for my dearest, dearest hubby.

But then I screwed up a little tonight with my clumsiness. Thankfully, everything was resolved and yeah, it was my fault. I'm really sorry babe. I realized my mistake and hopefully, it was not that bad till it screwed up your day.

I still want you to stay happy today and forever. Put up the day with a smile honey, and you will feel better that way. Oh, and since it's raining over there, do snug up the bed.

Next time.. it will be a better present..

Happy 20th Birthday, Thurdy, my dearest and I love you so much.. May all our wishes come true... goodnight. :)

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Tuesday, July 08, 2008

nobody@vox.com(L Miche) — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 15:56:47 +0800

Bahh.. woke up late but at least it was within the 8-hours sleep rule, not too long nor short. It felt funny to take lunch right after you woke up from a sleep and I wonder how many more days I'm left with to enjoy these sweet, lovely and peaceful pace of life just before the hectic ones transit in. Yeah, I mean school. I bet I'm gonna miss it so much, so dearly.

And I thought I saw a perfect hair day with nice curls on my tail in da morning! :)

Mom, is the only person I see for most of the mornings since I stopped attending school in February. I can wake up, chat with her, gossips about shows we watched in the previous night and some "history" talk during lunch, if there is any. Usually, there won't be lunch though... but last night, there were some leftovers so there was a chance to chat with her again.

No idea why but today I brought up the "death" topic and asked about how her pap died, and I also found out how pap's pap died, the unveiling reason. As she spoke, I kept on observing her face, searching for the sign of crying but there was nothing. It ended up with me unable to control my tears instead but luckily, it didn't flow. I believe I controlled well.

Mom's pap died of cancer and it was not a peaceful one. He had internal bleeding which he complained it was "stomachache". I was hoping to hear from mom that he died peacefully but it turned out pretty tragic, I find. I never see him before so I was curious about him which led me to question her more regarding to this... Then, I felt I had to stop otherwise I won't know how to react if mom do cries although I didn't spot any signs.

Pap's pap... well, it was a peaceful case, yeap. He died in a coma after a fall, probably? Coma simply is just someone still "sleeping" and since he died in it 4 days after getting into a deep sleep, I believe he decided in his dream that it was time to go. Which made me wonder... if that night I dreamt about death and my heart stopped, will I die in my sleep as well? As though, it was my choice to leave, peacefully?

Will anyone notice? Probably not.

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Sunday, July 06, 2008

nobody@vox.com(L Miche) — Sun, 06 Jul 2008 21:40:01 +0800

The night tonight is a little lonely... Ston went back to camp, my parents are asleep, bigbro went out, the TV is turned off and I'm alone at my workdesk, enjoying the peaceful moment I seldom get. Sometimes, just being alone does bring chills up my spine, sometimes I just can't help imagine if one day I'm all alone. Sometimes.. sometimes..

It's been a while since I sat in my workspace, quietly, concentrating on graphics work (not counting the time I was helping Min out, that was a little crappy). It felt just like being in Ben's class once again, nostalgic.

Shi Jin gave me the required details this afternoon. I managed to figure out the mess in the documents and spent the whole late afternoon working out on just the flyer. :/ Ai~yaya, I'm such a slow worker. With no idea in mind, I practically placed my faith on fonts to bring the flavour out from the design (that's not nice, I know) and downloaded over 11+ fonts from the net, heh.

Like usual, whenever I work on something, say graphic, I'm impressed with, I'll produce several results of the same thing for my "client" to choose. So, I ended up with like 5 results of just the flyer's design and my brain was totally burnt out in the end. I wonder if I can still do up the poster tonight? Hmm..

As I work, I realized I can only do well in graphics if I'm doing it for friends or myself... provided I'm interested in the idea as well. Ah! Can I keep this design and put it as my portfolio? :p

Today, I was hugging on to the new bag again. I guess I'm loving it. :)

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Monday, June 16, 2008

nobody@vox.com(L Miche) — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 21:53:47 +0800

Trust will grow back again because I love him.

I was thinking about it... guess I'll drop the matter. If they want to say, I don't have to ask already. It's up to the both of them to see if they want to tell me and put an end to this game.

I'm tired of getting whole load of confusion when I'm in an unsure situation at the moment. Just wanna keep a super low profile, like right now, no brothers around and my parents are sleeping, the house turned into such a peaceful place as though I'm living alone.

Probably, it's all meant to be. When hubby is here, we shall pay a visit to dear Michael then. I just hope hubby feels better when he wakes up which should be around the time now to wash up and go for work.

So worry for him as well.

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Monday, June 16, 2008 - Trust?

nobody@vox.com(L Miche) — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 12:42:11 +0800

It's hard to give my full trust on Thurdy right now after what I found out yesterday night. If he's here, intending to explain everything to me --- I'm so going to beat him up to pulp but I'm glad... this is not happening now. I don't wish to do so either...

I don't know who is Marko anymore too, I don't know if he's trustworthy.. what is going on?... I really don't know. Probably the both of them treated me as an outsider. Maybe..

I don't know who is lying and who is not. I just don't know now. In the end, I was the silly dumb one that got dragged in.

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Sunday, June 01, 2008

nobody@vox.com(L Miche) — Sun, 01 Jun 2008 18:07:56 +0800

Jun1st08 - Early bday gift

Early birthday gift from mama, Auntie Lian and Big Auntie. $30 gained.

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Tuesday, May 27, 2008

nobody@vox.com(L Miche) — Tue, 27 May 2008 21:07:34 +0800

Argg.. I felt pure stupidity and fatness of myself. I hope Thurdy don't feel bad and concentrate on his test. I'd be guilty if he didn't do well for today and it will be my fault definitely. I don't have the intention to make the start of his day sucked. I was wrong to get mad at him earlier on when I was trying to wake him up over MSN (I hated doing this so much but still when the clock hits 6, I'll spam him messages like an MSN-Alarm thing).

Probably the frustration of downloading and backing up my work from LEO this afternoon made me cranky. I went berserk pressing my keyboard buttons, got really worry that he was not replying, thinking that he was still sleeping and don't want him to be late for his test.

The berserk limit dried out and I got mad. I went offline straight away but got back in thinking that probably it was my MSN being laggy. I was still worry. When I got in back and spammed a couple more messages, there was no reply from him either until he finally replied he was all set to leave for school which made me went uber mad about it. I was thinking, "Why didn't you at least reply me with something to let me wait for you?". At least, that will calm my mind of worries and madness.

So, I told him that I was mad but I don't want to talk about it anymore since he was getting late and asked him to rush off right away. Thinking about it again, it was my fault. I still shouldn't have get mad about it but really, waking him up over MSN is irritating. Hubby just got to start loving his alarm otherwise, I'll make him do so.

It's not that I hate waking him up but bringing this into MSN really kills me. I'd rather wake him up when I'm close to him or die than to do anymore MSN-Alarm for him. Ahh... the distance is getting into my nerves like a poison but I got to relax. I got to... for the sake of our future.

Oh yea, I can download my work off from LEO when I was on the main desk but on lappy, it was impossible. That's good, one task off the list.

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2 mommies

nobody@vox.com(L Miche) — Fri, 23 May 2008 13:22:06 +0800

I've been wanting to talk about my 2 mommies - one blood-related and one not official yet but.. that's Thurdy's mommy.

The blood-related mommy is a fierce looking woman according from what my ex-schoolmates commented and is not a spendthrift. She's quite a saver and taught me how to lie. :) She taught me not to trust me people easily and by default, everyone should be treated as an enemy plus numerous other stuffs which she prefers to hint it and let me figure it out myself than telling it to me directly. She's quite a person who gets worry easily and loves to eavesdrop on topics that we don't talk to her about but to dad. She's not a good morale supporter but she tries. Hmm.. this roughly sums up about her.

The not official mommy is Thurdy's mom. In my mind, I feel that she's a lovely person who yearns for her passed away husband badly. She lets Thurdy to be with me and even played online games with me while Thurdy was away which made me feel that that's so cool! Although I haven't meet her before and I never can already but through Thurdy's photo album, she's still a cool figure in my mind that brought up a son with such great ambition. So, if you ask me what's the first thing I'll do when I'm in the US, that's definitely to visit Thurdy's parent's grave and plant some sweet smelling lavender if it's possible around it or roses. I believe she's looking over me too, she had seen my pictures and hear my voice before. :)

Hmm.. yesterday, Thurdy brought roses for her. It was lovely. :)

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